Category: Blogging

Daily Blog

Published on by mbcoudal2 Comments

For about 66 days I posted on one of my four blogs every single day. I started January 1, 2011.

I may keep up the daily habit or begin to post weekly.

Here’s how I did it:

1) Connected with a community of writers (Twitter, Facebook, 43Things, MediaBistro) 2) Gave myself permission to write only 100 words 3) Wrote early in the morning, late at night (and occasionally on my lunch hour) 4) Told myself ‘It will only take you 20 minutes’ 5) Showed my vulnerabilty 6) Showed my awesomeness.

For extra credit: 

1) Included photos 2) Told a story with a beginning, middle and end 3) Promoted books and philosophies I believe in 4) Piggybacked on other bloggers’ good ideas 5) Commented on others’ blog posts.

What I learned:

1) That writing improves your self esteem 2) That there is always something to write about 3) That I began to organize my life and thoughts around the four different blog areas — fitness, writing, spirituality and New York 4) That how-to posts and completely honest posts were the most popular 5) That my writing, especially the first couple of paragraphs, have to be simple and not witty (Humor comes later. Explaining the point of what I’m writing comes first.)

If it's fun, it's good

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“We buy these difficult books because we feel that, while not very exciting, they are in some way good for us…It’s a sort of literature-as-bran-flake philosophy: If something is dry and unpalatable, it must be doing some good to our constitutions.” (No Plot? No Problem! by Chris Baty)

I have written about how I loved NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month). Such a creative, fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants, positive way to write a novel.

“With his startlingly mediocre prose style and complete inability to write credible dialogue, Chris has set a reassuringly low bar for budding novelists everywhere,” says Chris Baty about himself, the founder of NaNoWriMo. Awesome. http://www.nanowrimo.org/

I love that. So funny.

See, sometimes I feel — especially at work — that the most morose, the most academic, the most acerbic, that person wins. The one who puts others down? Yup, he or she  gets respected, if not promoted. But what about the nice guy/gal?

Hello! It’s harder to remain positive than to go negative.

It’s easier to be Debbie Downer than Ula Upbeat! Just because someone is negative, doesn’t mean they’re smart and right. And just because someone is positive, it doesn’t mean they’re dumb and wrong.

Ever since the leadership academy, I’m starting to see a shift in the culture of meetings and conversations at my workplace. People are affirming one another more. People are acknowledging that it’s okay to have fun at work. It’s okay to compliment one another’s work or unique style. It’s okay to be creative and, even, passionate.

At the library, I do have the impulse to choose the weighty, solemn and classic tome, but in fact, I should choose the fluffy, fun and juicy book. It’s more palatable. Just because a food tastes good, doesn’t mean it’s bad for you. Mother’s milk is very sweet.

And blueberries? Fun, yummy, good for you.

Just like “No Plot? No Problem!” Chris Baty’s funny, simple, profound how-to. Reading this book has got me psyched for next November when NaNoWriMo takes off again. Anyone want to join me? It’s more fun than eating bran flakes. And when the bar is set so low, everyone can cross!

Quoted

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Yesterday I grabbed a newspaper off my desk to read while waiting for the Riverside bus home. I found the cover story, “Unplugged: Tech sabbath strengthens connection to God,” very interesting, because I frequently contemplate and write about How much connectedness do we really need? And then I found the article extremely interesting and surprising and yes, smart, because I was quoted in it. http://www.umportal.org/article.asp?id=7622

I loved this article written by Mary Jacobs for the The United Methodist Reporter, especially upon seeing my own name. I thought, wow, I’m an expert and I’m quotable. I kept reading the article hoping I might be quoted again. But I was not. Still, I was excited.

As soon as I walked in the door I bragged to my son, “Hey, I’m quoted in a newspaper article.”

“What did you say?” he asked. So I read him my quotable quote:

Mr. Burton-Edwards thinks multi-tasking can fragment the spirit and soul, too. Constant interruptions affect our ability “to be attentive to people, and to be in the moment,” he says. “They wreak havoc on our focus.”

Mary Beth Coudal, a staff writer for the General Board of Global Ministries, has seen that in herself.

“Social media has contributed to my short attention span,” she writes in a blog. “I’m beginning to wonder if this constant social media chatter is drowning out my ability to listen to the ‘still, small voice of God.’” She cited a co-worker who called the constant digital distraction “a traffic jam in my mind.”

My son was unimpressed. In fact, he was dismissive, “You sound like a religious freak. Like a crazy killer obsessed with God who hears voices.” I was amused AND offended.

I was taking a hiatus from blogging, but seeing my name in a newspaper article reinvigorated my commitment to my daily blog postings, including this one, dedicated to the Connected Life.

When you’re quoted once, you want to be quoted again.

A Generation of Disconnected Kids

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As I was leaving work tonite, I grabbed a book from my bookshelf to read on the bus ride home. I found these notes I had written about a year ago:

I give my kids what I wish I had when I was growing up — braces, nice sneakers, designer clothes. When one of my darlings walks by me and I’m reading the paper, I drop it, I snatch them close. I hug and kiss them.

If there’s a bagel that needs cutting, let me do it. I’d rather risk injury.

I feel sorry for them. Their dad is kind of sick. Their mom works a lot. But hey, wait! That’s me! I don’t think I should feel sorry for them. Why AM I the only one who sets the table and pours the milk into the cereal bowls?

I’m so tired that it’s easier for me to do what needs to be done than have them step up to the plate. I allow them to be dependent. They need to be more responsible.

Somewhere I got the idea that childhood should be soft and warm and adulthood hard and cold. It is wearying. I am getting tired.

The book that prompted these thoughts, where I found my handwritten notes, is Madeline Levine’s “The Price of Privilege: How Parental Pressure and Material Advantage Are Creating a Generation of Disconnected and Unhappy Kids.”

Here are some quotes near my notes: “Both intrusion and overinvolvement prevent the development of the kinds of skills that children need to be successful: the ability to be a self-starter, the willingness to engage in trial-and-error learning, the ability to delay gratification… Warmth often slides into unhealthy dependency when we turn to our children for the loving connections missing in our adult relationships.”

Wow.

I think my kids are connected, happy and have aspirations towards responsibilty. But I have to nurture them and, at times, correct them.

If I give them warmth, which they need, it doesn’t mean I am sliding into unhealthy dependency. Nor does firm guidance mean I am lacking in love or warmth.

One startling premise of the book is that children of wealthy families are unhappier than children in poor families. Tough circumstances force family members to lean on one another, eat meals together and bond.

This book was a book club pick, although I never finished it and missed the discussion. Still, the premise bears discussing. Just today at work, my friend D. and I were talking about how difficult — and necessary — it is to let kids know your expectations of them. This helps them claim and feel proud of the ways that they have acted responsibly.

There is a happy and healthy middle ground between being your kid’s best friend and being the bad guy. I am finding that middle ground.

The Other Way To Read

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I forgot how to read a real book. I am reading “The Other,” by David Guterson. I bought the real book, not the e-book book. (Thanks, Dad, for the bookstore gift certificate!)

And when I got to the end of an early chapter, I closed the book, and reminded myself to remember that I’d stopped there. On an e-book, there’s no need for book marks or reminders to yourself. The e-book remembers for you. You turn it on and voila, you’re right at your stopping-off point.

So back to my paperback book, a day later, I opened “The Other,” and started at Chapter 3 which seemed right, until the end of chapter. The narrator referred to a character as if I, the reader, should already know who she was. But I was yet to be introduced. Yes, I flipped back and realized I’d completely skipped Chapter 2.

I have become so used to reading on an e-book that I’ve lost my knack for reading a real book. It is taking me a moment to relearn, but I will get there. I’m smart like that.

Reading is one of my life rules, my routes to sanity — My Rule #2 is escape through literature. https://mbcoudal.wordpress.com/2011/02/19/rule-2-escape-through-literature/

https://mbcoudal.wordpress.com/

A Girl and Her Laptop

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This morning I walked to work through Barnard College campus. Here is what I saw and what I thought. It is more than the sun that shines today. Women writers are brilliant. image

Resilience

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My father had a motto, which I think he got from Woody Allen, “Showing up in uniform dressed to play is 99 percent of the game.” Sometimes finding the uniform is tough. But usually, I’m good to go. I show up. And that’s the best I can do. Like showing up to write in one of my blogs every day.

Every new year I vow to get organized, save money, and work out more. And in 2011, I promised myself I’d blog for 66 days and I’m almost there.

I remember a Physics lesson from college (although it was the only class where I got a D). A body in motion stays in motion. And so I stay in motion. I just keep playing, showing up to my life wearing my uniform. I keep going.

For me the tough part of being married to someone with Parkinson’s Disease is that there are times when he is not ready to play. He can’t find his uniform. He’s slow to the game. (I hesitate to ever complain one iota about his disease because yes, I know, it’s tough, yes, worse on him or anyone with a chronic or serious condition. And, hey, what am I complaining about?) But sometimes showing up means telling it like it is. And that’s the way it is tonight.

But tomorrow I’ll get up early. I’ll write in my journal. I’ll get dressed in my work clothes, my uniform. I’ll get ready to play. And I’ll help anyone that needs help. And I’ll try to remember to thank God that I’m on a team.

Huff Po Editor Talks About AOL Merger

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Alana B. Elias Kornfeld, the Living section editor at Huffington Post, told the Religion Communicators Council yesterday she is not sure how the AOL-Huff Po merger will play out.

But she does know that some trends will definitely remain worthy of reportage — like the green movement and our need to unplug.

I find it ironic — and cool — that a plugged-in website advocates unplugging from the web. Don’t get me wrong. I’m a fan of living off the grid. I renamed this blog The Connected Life because I’m trying to connect more to family and friends through face time rather than Facebook time.

On religion, Kornfeld said Huffington Post is not interested in religion — as in the politics of religion — but in religion — as in providing a “Space that gives rise to an inspired experience.”

I’m a fan of share and inspired experiences. And a lot of people are fans of Huffington Post — 56 million unique visitors per month and they’re expecting at least 200 mill more with the AOL merger. Kornfeld said that AOL has a loyal brand following, while Huff Po has substantive content. Nice when big brand marries big content!

I am a fan of Alana’s. And of Arianna’s. I met Arianna a long time ago and kinda knew she was going places.

I love what Arianna’s been saying lately about our need to get more sleep! (my post from last month, inspired by Huffington’s Ted Talk:  http://gettingmyessayspublished.wordpress.com/2011/01/09/get-up-early/ ) I’d like to say more about yesterday’s luncheon, but you guessed it, I’ve got to go to bed!)

Incidentally, yesterday’s RCC was held at the Opus Dei headquarters on 34th and Lexington. Really nice and clubby, reminded me of the Yale Club. Nicer than the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints near Lincoln Center where the RCC met last month.

The RCC is a great group. At the annual gathering this year in Little Rock, Arkansas, Abderrahim Foukara, Head of Al-Jazerra in the US will deliver the keynote address. http://www.religioncommunicators.org/ Should be interesting.

Online Writing Class Part 2

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So my teacher Julia Dahl suggested my story about the New York Times Travel Show might be right for Time Out New York Kids.

An earlier version of the story can be found at: http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/mbcoudal/3/1267469654/tpod.html (The Travel Show is Feb. 25th to 27th. I’m going back!)

So I called the magazine and immediately got a live person. I can’t tell you her name. Because, like Valerie Plame, I keep my sources secret.

One of my favorite lines is from the outed CIA agent, Valerie Plame, played by Naomi Watts in the movie Fair Game, who said, “You can’t break me. I have no breaking point.”

Back to my story — I talked very briefly to a lovely editor who accepted my submission, and then within an hour, sent me a wonderful rejection, which basically said, “This isn’t right for us, but feel free to pitch to me in the future.”

So, I feel great! I have a source. I have to continue to make connections, write a lot, learn a lot. I have to gain more insider info. I want to become the Wikileaks of online writing classes. At least for a few more weeks until my Boot Camp for Journalists class is over.

I do want to get some of my millions of essays published. And this boot camp is not going to break me. Because I have no breaking point. And who knows? It might make me.

I am nothing, if not optimistic.

Online Writing Class

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I started an online writing class a few weeks ago through MediaBistro. I figured I ought to take an online writing class because eventually I will teach one.

It’s called Boot Camp for Journalists. Classes with boot camp in the title seem to be very popular. A Facebook friend just finished a Spiritual Direction Boot Camp (which seems like an oxymoron).

Like every new endeavor, I expected this Boot Camp to fulfill a lot of my needs — intellectual, emotional, social, and my love of newness. (I am in love with New Things! New Classes! New Ideas! http://gettingmyessayspublished.wordpress.com/2011/01/28/the-tyranny-of-new/) And most importantly, this class, I thought, will help me get my essays published. But this Boot Camp is tough. I am behind on two assignments. I have a lot to learn.

Last week, we learned about pitching.

Our teacher, Julia Dahl, told us when pitching a story to a magazine be sure to address our e-mail to a real person. This is so smart. Yet magazines’ mastheads offer a generic email address for submissions, like fiction@newyorker.com What’s a writer to do?

I don’t want to give away all my juicy insider info, but okay, you broke me, the answer is call the magazine and get a real person’s name. I decided to try this yesterday.

Sorry, I’ll have to tell you how my pitch went tomorrow. Because I’ve got to run, get one of my darlings out of the tub, clean the kitchen, and start on tonite’s assignment before class starts at 9 pm (EST). Yes, in 45 minutes.