I like to read book reviews. That way, I feel I’ve kind of read the book. So after reading a Q&A with Brian McLaren, “A New Kind of Christianity” in the UMReporter, I thought “This guy and me — we are on the same page. We should be friends.”

I didn’t want to be real friends, just jokey cyberfriends. So I Facebooked him. He would not me be my first friend on Facebook whom I have never met in person. Brian and I have several mutual friends, including Jim Wallis.

Yup, Bri was on Facebook. I found his profile but instead of a picture of himself, there was a picture of his book. A cool book cover with a vine-covered Celtic cross. It was the book that had the review I liked. Not a review actually. Even easier to read than an actual whole book review — a Q&A.

“Great, we’ll be cyberfriends,” I thought. We are both into the New Age Christianity Movement mentality. “Good ‘ole Bri,” I think as I clicked on the handy-dandy, “Add as Friend” button. And you know what? It said that Bri has “too many friends.” Yup, he topped out at 4,813 friends.

Now who sets the limit of friendship? Did Bri tell Facebook? “When I hit 4,813, I’m done. No more. Basta!” Or did Facebook say, “This guys’ friends are clogging up our works, like photos on a hard drive, slowing our system down? He’s done!”

I heard this happened to a friend of mine with Don Cheadle. She actually had a tenuous friendship with him and wanted to Friend him. And yup, too many friends for good old Don, too.

Now, I can kind of understand Don Cheadle having too many friends. He’s a movie star and a director and well, famous. But have any of you ever heard of Brian McLaren? What’s so great about him? Why does he get to have so many friends? I’m just like Bri and I still have room for friends.

Also, what’s all this about a new brand of Christianity if there aren’t room for more friends? I don’t know. I’m digressing. That’s the point of a blog I guess.

What I’m really trying to say is “Why does Bri have more friends than me? Why can’t I develop a cult following like Bri?” I’m going to assume it has something to do with his book cover and the fact that I don’t currently have a book out right now. Let alone a cool, hip, rethink church book.

No, in case you’re wondering, I’m not jealous. I’m just curious. Why Bri? And why not me?